SKILLS FOR THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE

City Ruins

Happy Monday!  Want to talk about the impending apocalypse?  I was watching the preview for World War Z, or talking about Mayans, or possibly watching some other movie where Earth has been transformed into an intergalactic paperweight, when it occurred to me that I may need to work on a few things.

Assuming I survived whatever killed 99.9% of the rest of the population, what exact skills would I have to survive, say, the next 5 hours?  Answer: a lot.  What to do next?  Well, make a list, for one thing, of the type of skills that I need to continue to live for a short while longer on an otherwise desolate planet.

To Do:

  1. Learn to make a fire
  2. Learn to hunt animals for food (no one seems to grow their own food – is this a possibility, or will others just kill me for gardening, because no one thinks long term anymore)
  3. Learn to hot wire a car.  Related: learn to drive stick shift because that will inevitably come up.
  4. Learn to pick locks or other breaking and entering techniques.
  5. Own and shoot a gun with 90% accuracy (basically must hit a zombie in the head from a comfortable distance)
  6. Get lasik.
  7. Learn basic fighting techniques. (This may be useful just in general.)
  8. Be able to run in short spurts without falling (this is key).
Did I miss anything?
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s